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Weekly CICADA-scope

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Week of 4/2: CICADA-scope

Autumn

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1_Aries.png.e7c8949208a07b2906a7b92f79742189.pngAries: March winds and April showers bring forth unholy powers.

 

2_Taurus.png.6e2caf477161e1668cd37a56a110b618.pngTaurus: The floor isn’t actually lava. It’s the walls you need to worry about.

 

3_Gemini.png.ea7a1641915052ddb3f5f2bd07e97b6b.pngGemini: Your relationship will enter a new and exciting stage this week when your partner presents you with the traditional gift of a silk-wrapped, partially digested moth.

 

4_Cancer.png.970874db3af326d613bdb22a9933ab46.pngCancer: Follow your dreams, but do so stealthily and at a safe distance so they never know you’re coming until it’s too late.

 

5_Leo.png.c611ee3756337ea895516d0c8778039f.pngLeo: Your alchemic career will hit a weird note when you somehow manage to transmute gold into a tasteful lead bust of 14th-century monk Nicolas Flamel.

 

6_Virgo.png.f7f8ab3268aec4054a8c824d929e5054.pngVirgo: Aim for the moon. Hit the moon. Field dress the moon. De-bone the moon. Cook the moon. Devour the moon.

 

7_Libra.png.76e7f78f302ecac98755be4546ac7efc.pngLibra: A lot of people refer to their partner as their “rock,” but this is actually pretty literal in your case.

 

8_Scorpio.png.16821b588133b7e2cc2562189b7c7c66.pngScorpio: The hounds are on their way.

 

9_Sagittarius.png.510623df41b6c7f39964f6e77ebdd966.pngSagittarius: Work on your communication skills this week. Not everybody responds positively to sustained unearthly screeching in a range only audible to certain whales.

 

10_Capricorn.png.62e1a9972e18202bb7a5d4325ec9a61b.pngCapricorn: An opportunity to build a new friendship will arise when you complete cytokinesis and divide to create a genetically identical copy of yourself.

 

11_Aquarius.png.b8e9645a338da488052480b55cae1c74.pngAquarius: Yes, that person saw you reading fanfiction on your phone.

 

12_Pisces.png.9250eaa6fa0a042073807380733d36f1.pngPisces: If you can’t become an inspiration to future generations, the next best thing is to become a cautionary tale.

 

images © xenia_ok/Shutterstock.com; painterr//Shutterstock.com

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