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krav maga

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after logan @drowntown

hook punch. my father tells me when i am maybe 13 or 14
that he would love to sign me up for a self-defense class, but
he’d have to get me a personal (& concussion-trained) teacher. 
this is a fact of my medical history. 

cross-body punch. my father continues, you might be in college, 
at a party, and a boy might say
—this was before i came out—and 
a boy might say, “do you want to go upstairs and look at my Marvel 
Comics collection?”

straight punch. he might pin you to the bed and leave you violated.
empty. focus not on what is being protected against. focus only on
going through the motions. getting these moves just right. and you’ll
have to go to the police and let them probe inside of you, looking for
the damaged points.

uppercut. this is why i need you to be safe with boys, with girls, with
anyone, really. fix your stance.
i can’t make a fist properly. he gives up
on the lesson. i know he’s too fearful of what lurks within me to ever
successfully complete a lesson with me, anyway. too worried about me
to ever put hands on me, even in a lesson.

  • author's note: i have a crippling fear of assault/rape/etc., and i was in a situation similar to the aziz ansari stuff when i was 14. it's...not fun, hearing my own father say that what ansari's accuser reported trivializes "real" assault.
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he/him pronouns please!
butch dysphoria is real

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