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*so a few days ago I woke up in the middle of the night, wrote down these first two lines, went back to bed, and then completely forgot about it until recently.  when I found it...this happened. something seems kinda off about it though and I would appreciate critique so so sooo much!!!*

 

the sunspot pupils in those

stained-glass windows to her soul

contract in the sudden daylight

yellow alights on shining olive skin

black lashes flutter

in sweet song-filled summer wind

that smells like strawberries

and blooming brightening honeysuckle

 

leaves turn golden and so does her smile

wide and gorgeous

unreserved as the overlapping

whispers of northern breeze

that bring change and a promising chill

anticipation hangs suspended in her gaze

a silver wire-delicate moon

backed by velvet affection

 

now snow falls as gently

as her embrace in the ice-weathered air

adorning her rich curls

a crystal tiara or a million winking stars

she ponders the coldness of loss and

of love’s thawing exterior

when seated by a lazy orange hearth

cheeks blazing rouge and hot teartracks drying

 

the sky looks like an ocean again

and her perfume smells like petrichor

forest orchestras wake up the world

and her topaz eyes soften

in warm wise sunlight

the earth is a sleeping goddess

rubbing her eyes and stretching languidly

awakening at last

in the light

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um hello yes this is gorgeous

6 hours ago, writeandleft said:

the sunspot pupils in those

stained-glass windows to her soul

contract in the sudden daylight

I mean godDAMN

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duuude, the imagery in this is incredible! each stanza feels kind of like seasons changing, i like it a lot <3

7 hours ago, writeandleft said:

she ponders the coldness of loss and

of love’s thawing exterior

when seated by a lazy orange hearth

cheeks blazing rouge and hot teartracks drying

O.o love these lines

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