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hey, he says, leans over my shoulder

hey.

he's soft against my cheek but his chin is boney on my arm

it's a weird sort of closeness

where close

is

glue?

or maybe a lifeline.

 

we used to fight.

like,

you are so damn annoying

but without the cursing because we were young like

shut up you're the worst

like

don't speak to me at night if you don't want to be yelled at 

but hey, we're older now and it's

different?

or maybe it's not, like

we were always close but now i finally see it

 

when your sibling is the worst, am i right? 

ten things only a sibling will know:

1. beating each other up over the last cookie

that's just

wrong?

it's fighting but it's gentler

it's i don't want to give you the front seat but i will

it's

bake me a cake for my birthday or good morning here's a hug or here are my secrets that you already know

 

did you know when i came out he hugged me?

he didn't say a word. just, leaned over and hugged me.

 

i like to touch his face

ruffle his hair

poke fun at his gangly limbs and sharp, sharp bones and high-pitched, low-pitched voice.

 

i'm gonna get a tumblr

holy fuck noah i'm filtering out tags for you

 

it's weird to think we're getting older 

when just a heartbeat ago he was playing with trains on our white-carpet floor

thud, thud of the soccer ball against the front door, and at least that hasn't changed

but 

now to look at him i have to look up

and 

now when i hear his voice i think it's our father's

and

he's fifteen on tuesday and it's such a slow-paced, rapid change

whiplash through the years because

when did you grow up?

 

(((AN: do you think i should give this to him for his birthday? like i already made him a cake but i don't have an actual present because he's impossible to shop for but the lil bro is gonna be FIFTEEN and i feel like i should do something other than a three-layer cake.)))

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I *really* like this. I also have a little sibling, so I get the struggle. I think Noah would adore this. (And also he’s a big kid who can filter his own tags)

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Yeah, I really think he'd love this! It captures everything about having a brother who you're close with so nicely. (I have one too)


respect existence or expect resistance

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