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Posted (edited)

and it’s horribly cruel but

who would ever love you?

red marble is bloodied not pure unnatural in texture and

weak lunged slow-witted wild hair

(knotted mess)

obvious blush

ugly tears

liar

fishing for compliments and

playing dumb isn’t a good look for you and

not much is a good look for you

purple veins seen beneath pale palms

bloodied specks hiding in shadows of knees and elbows

smooth you are not

with tiger-clawed hips

a patchwork of scars and dependency

who would ever love you?

never first

except in birth

mantle heavy on your shoulders

tied back to them by love and deep-set fears of

losing

failure is an old friend

or at least it pretends to be

masks only cover

they don’t free

stop and let your breath catch

catch your breath instead

or you are weak sick fragile useless

undeserving

why do you think you’re good enough

you should be grateful

loving family

some money

friends that care they do care

a school an education a future

white straight cis neurotypical

(probablies)

those curves are ones nobody will ever

want to touch

the eyes shine not from tears but

determination because

big girls don’t cry

unless they’re disappointing

unless they’re failing

but then they see they’ve gotten to you

they will remain cloaked

daggers already under my skin

 

Edited by queenie_flower
I was going to delete this but then it helped alana feel better and that made me feel a little better so I just super edited it down to remind myself that it was here
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here is a spontaneous bad poem in response

 

i'm reading someone else's words

but they sound like mine in my head

you have everything

i wait for something that sounds like not me

but they've perfectly impersonated my second voice

you don't deserve to be proud

it feels nice to fall into my own words

coming from someone else

your friends don't love you

they aren't nice words

but they belong to us together now

it's good to hear yourself criticised 

it's good to hear yourself echoed

maybe i'm a little more human

other people have real problems

other people say what i do

other people feel like i do

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